it took me 9 years to post a cover again after dating a musician... and I chose the hardest song to sing ever so, forgive the mistakes, hope you didn't even notice.
you can listen it here!

so I picked "100 nights of hero" to watch just because I just watched the trailer for "victorian psycho" and it made me want to watch maika monroe again, but I'll write a bit more in my media log, after it I saw the cast giving an interview to letterbox where they list their 4 favorite queer movies so I decided to list here mine here, these are not my favorite of all time, just the one's in my head at the moment:
MY 4 FAVORITE 4 QUEER MOVIES AT THE MOMENT:
- I saw the tv glow (2024): this might be my favorite of all time bc it's so my vibe, I love this movie so much
- to wong foo, thanks for everything, jule newmar (1995): I watched the other day and I have not stopped thinking about it
- the rocky horroc picture show (1975): OF COURSE
- my own private idaho (1991): there are so many I love but for this list this will be my fourth bc I watched recently and it's very good

I was looking for something a little more current to watch, bc I've been watching a lot of old movies, when I came across a litle article titled "the most anticipated movies of 2026" followed by a list of the most boring movies made by human kind (majority of them sequels). imagine anticipating the 39th marvel movie.

inside of me there are two wolves. one is a manic data scientist and the other is a mentally ill artist. the data scientist's only purpose is to make the artist's life better and happier.

I've been having trouble sleeping lately, and I don't know why but being irrationally scared always calms down my actual fears about living in a dumpster fire of a world as an autistic person with no real support system, so I've been picturing sperm whales sleeping in my mind, if you never seen it, it's the scariest thing. when that does not work I picture a dark figure in the corner of my room. it always calms me down.

july was such a horrible month, and I dated a gemini man this year so I am familiar with horrible months, but FUCK!
I'll try to update the site better for now on, I need to update the media log and the commonplace page, but things are still very much up in the air. so who knows if I'll even be alive next month.

I wanted to organize my notion notes for literally months today I did it thanks to this diva!
she not only had great ideas of lists to add to my collection, she also organize them on notion. now my lists and notes are somewhat organized (some notes I just hid in a group) and look cute as fuck!

I also finally created the creation page today!
it's pretty much empty but it looks so cute!
I noticed the best two days of this vacation (yesterday and today) I basically spent on front on my computer on a flow state creating or planning or reviewing things. I tried to go out one day, I spent a lot of money on ubers and I did not even like it.
maybe I should just stay where I'm happiest: my room - going out daily just to go on a walk and get some sunlight.

I FINALLY updated the media log.
I listened to so many albuns last month but did not loved any of them (olivia rodrigo has all the good music references but I'm so sick of music complaining about men)
about the backrooms / obsession thing, let me just finish my thoughs here bc the medialog space is tiny: backrooms took a cool concept and made a basic movie (visually super cool, but I did not liked the plot), while obsession took a basic concept and made a really cool movie.

I've been on vacation for a week now and only now I'm updating this place
I have so many things I want to do here and I took the day to do it, so tell me why I spent the entire morning redesigning all my spreadsheets on google sheets? to what end? TO WHAT END? but also, they are looking so clean and beautiful!! hope I can keep up with than, because I have at least 3 places where I track things (notion, google sheets and physical journal)...
anyway, I spent the week thinking about things to post here and now I forgot it all, great.

I got the first comment on my site!!!!
2 comments actually. but it came to my attention that I do not have a button for my site, nor do I know how to put a button on my site or how buttons work at all. I feel like I should know this considering I'm ancient. but I'm working (at least I should be) and i can't figure this out right now. I'll be anxious aboit it until is fixed.

some times the internet feels a little bit like "the old days". this used to be a safe space before the marks and the elons, even porn filled tumblr was better than instagram nowadays. but some days are good.

life feels a little bit more colorful lately, it could be one of three things: I’m happier, which I don’t think is the case here considering all; it’s been raining less this year and I’ve been more apreciative of the sun; my new sunglasses are like an instagram filter for real life, but I only have them for three days.

two things:
isn't it funny that I created this page the same day I deactivated my twitter account?
also, what will this page look like when there's way to much posts? will I even post in here often?

time will tell.

I had this whole post on my mind about how posting anything on social media nowadays feels forced and fake, and that I deleted all of my followers/following pages on threads (did not deleted my account there yet bc I have a hidden agenda), and the only reason I did not delete twitter yet is because obama follows me for some reason, but then I just took a print of it and diactivated my account.
goodbye to my mutual barack obama!

THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING!
just testing this shit out